Selling My Wii, For Reals
July 24, 2008

I know that I've talked about it before, but I'm finally getting around to doing it. I'll be distributing fliers at work advertising that my Wii is for sale. I figure, the sheer fact that I haven't unpacked it since moving has to say something about my love of the system. My recent PS3 purchase has ground the idea of keeping the Wii into the ground - I just plain don't like the Wii's line-up. I do admit that there's a few good games out there that I haven't picked up, but I feel like they don't really warrant keeping the system.

It also doesn't help that I can't hook it up to my monitor, and it requires a TV since it only has analog output. Unfortunate indeed, but the Wii is also something that I couldn't play from my office chair.

So, the Wii is going up for sale whether it likes it or not. I'll be selling it off for $250 to friends or coworkers, or putting it up on eBay to try to get more money out of the little guy. I figure that it'll put a nice dent into the PS3's price that I've just paid and finally get it to stop collecting dust in my house.

Goodbye Wii!

I'm Sorry Wii, but I Don't Like You
April 02, 2008

I know, I'm going back one what I said over a year ago - but I'm convinced now that the Wii really wasn't a great purchase. It's OK, really. A mediocre system with 0.02% mediocre games and 99.98% Disney Cartoons. The clearly dazed middle aged man in GameStop said it best to his little son the other day when he said; "Gosh Timmy, look at all these littlekid games. Wouldn't you love to have one of these?". The Wii, and to a large extent the DS, is nothing more than a system to play Disney Cartoons on. Oh sure, you can trot out Mario Galaxy and Super Smash Brothers Brawl (*yawn*, I played that on the GC ten light years ago) - or you can bring up No More Heroes or Zach and Wiki. In almost three years, there have only been enough decent games released to be counted on my fingers. That's pretty sad.

At this point I've bought most of the big releases (Metroid Prime 3, Mario Galaxy and Smash Bros) and been fairly disappointed. Nay, I've been disappointed. Smash Bros really was a *yawn*rific game because it really is the GC version. The Wiimote isn't even used, you can play the whole thing with a GC controller no less. Metroid Prime 3 was annoying with all it's "I want to be Shadow of the Collosus and make the entire game into boss battles". Mario Galaxy actually got some time out of me, but the lack of story really bored me. Zelda:TP is about the only "good" game that I've seen released on the Wii and even it has its problems; what with the linearity of it all. Even with all this supposed gaming goodness, my Wii and many others' is simply gathering dust.

Down the pike, Fire Emblem sounds interesting (already released, I know) and I would like to pick it up and try it - but there's just too many bad games for the Wii that I'm leary at this point. Even Mario Kart is not very interesting to me; given what they've done with Smash Bros I forsee Mario Kart also not using the Wiimote and being Mario Kart: DD with improved graphics. *woohoo*. Halo 3 demonstrated more innovation over Halo 2 than Smash Bros Wii did over Smash Bro GC. That's right, I went there.

Anyway. This is a long winded post to basically say, Nintendo - I think you fucked up bad. The GameCube was a failure with about 3 games released for it and I hoped the Wii would be different. Alas, it wasn't. It really is the GameCube Turbo and Smash Bro's Brawl has proven that. The system had a lot of potential, but it failed to live up to it and I think that I'm generally done with it now. This may shock you, but I think I may actually put my system up on eBay. Frankly, I'm 24 and don't want to play Hannah Montana Returns to Middle School. Goodnight Wii, I think I may finally be done with you.

Metroid Prime 3: Corruption
September 03, 2007

The coming months are definitely going to be a terror for my both my poor wallet and my utter lack of time. Why's that? Well, there are so many stupendous looking games coming out that I simply won't have time for them all! This week's distraction is brought to you by the letter "M".

Nintendo carries with them a little bit of our childhood. The collective gamer psyche, if you will, has ingrained within it Mario, Zelda and Metroid. These three series provide the major cash-cow that keeps Nintendo Corp. afloat amongst it's 20+ fan-base. If you can tell me that there is not one game in those three that you are not utterly-scarily-guy-in-a-fox-suit in love with - then you are not a gamer - or you're David who missed out on the 8bit and 16bit era.

Super Metroid is quite possibly my favorite video game of all time. It had all the elements that I loved as a kid. There was side-scrolling shootie action, suit upgrades, slight RPG elements and tons of exploration of a gorgeously detailed amazing environment. Everything was beautifully memorable for me - the first time the surveilance eye shone on my new Morph Ball self, the giant lumbering robots in The Wrecked Ship and bursting through the pipe in Maridia... there were so many kick-ass elements that you never wanted to stop.

Fast forward to the era of the GameCube and witness with me Metroid Prime. This, a Metroid game was not. It was interesting, sure. It had character building elements, sure. However, there was absolutely nothing memorable to me. Perhaps I didn't truly "appreciate" the game, but I ended up just playing until I could get to the next save point and getting bored with it. To me, the Metroid series had died at the hands of lulz3dgraphics.

Metroid Prime 2: Echoes was much the same. There was an interesting story, which to this day I wish I had the energy to advance through, but the gameplay was boring. Hugely boring involving lots of fiddly jumping bits with me praying for a save point.

Last week, however, Retro Studios finally released a game that doesn't utterly abuse the Metroid license. While MP3 is not a true Metroid game, only being set in the Metroid universe, it is an astoundingly great game worthy of high praises.

The game opens as you fiddle around inside your ship, with the Wiimote of course, and dock with a giant starship to find a new bounty. Sure enough, big things happen and shit blows up sending you scrambling back to your ship fighting Space Pirates all the way. It isn't until you reach a planet's surface and finally begin exploring that you realize how much of a treat you're in for. Your first mission has you actually teaming up with other bounty hunters in order to accomplish your goal - and after your first Ridley battle (bastard... I killed you five games ago!) you appreciate the help.

Throughout the game you will be constantly reminded of the reason that you purchased the Wii - the beautiful Wiimote. I've never liked the motion sensing on the Wiimote, but the pointer action is definitely where it's at. The feeling of actually moving your arm and watching Samus' waggle around is... surreally awesome. It just feels right. You at least owe it to yourself to play the game, just to see that a First Person Shooter can really be done well on the Wii.

The game itself looks gorgeous and the artwork is beautiful. When you first touch down on Byyron and see the defense golems, you'll be reminded of why the Metroid universe keeps us coming back for more. The architecture is wonderfully designed and the creatures are definitely a treat to engage in battle. Even the user interface looks delicious, right down to Samus staring back at you from the inside of her helmet while you use your scanners. MP3 really does leave you wondering why none of the other Wii games look this good.

While I mentioned before that this is merely a game set in the Metroid universe, I can't help but say that this is a game worthy of being named in Metroid's honor. Good controls, good gameplay and a kick-ass story make this a game to definitely add to your library. What's better? It's your Wii library! That's right kids, there's actually something worth buying for the Wii!

My Verdict: Definitely Buy

Warioware: Smooth Moves
February 18, 2007

So, I was over at Andy's today and something miraculous happened. Andy bought Warioware: Smooth Moves. I'm sure that you've heard of it; if you're David, Andy or James. It's basically a combination of lots of different microgames ranging from cleaning a cow's ass to maintaining the vertical nature of a broom. It sounds kind of offbeat and Japanese. It is. But it's amazing. Draz was over, and we all sat down and beat the game within a few hours. But then we moved on to the minigames... and the unlocked levels... and higher scores... and more unlocked levels... and I was hooked.

I left Andy's around 08:15P in order to get to Gamestop before it closed. I arrived home bearing a small package wrapped in tell-tale plastic - and my wife knew what it contained. Only the greatest form of entertainment known to me, a VIDEO GAME. I plugged it in and became totally lost. It was too much for Emily to handle, but I couldn't stop playing. I got halfway through the main game when I finally let her have the TV back - and I can't wait to go farther.

This is a great party game. It's not for those who get angry at losing, because you'll suck at first - but after you open up it becomes an amazing act of learning new things and trying to solve the /puzzle/ of how you're trying to play the game.

If you remember old Atari games... imagine 200 Atari games each played in under 5 seconds and with updated graphics. You've got it. FANTASTMORGASMIC! If you thought that Wii sports got you worked up, you haven't seen anything yet. My legs actually hurt from some of the minigames and I'm fit. Wonderous. You'll even get to dance!

Ok. Enough talk. Go buy it. If you own a Wii. Which the gaming readers of my blog do. So go buy it. Now.

The Wii, After I Cooled Off
December 28, 2006

So, awhile back I mentioned that E. and I had successfully finagled ourselves a Wii. However, I never told you guys how much we liked it! Well, after having spent quite a few hours playing it I can confidently say that we love it. We've even re-arranged our living room and deprecated our coffee table for the little guy!

A couple of run down points...

• The controls are fantastic. Tennis is great, and even E. has gotten into this thing. Swinging Link's sword around has never been this fun.
• The graphics are good. They're not the super CG quality of the PS3, but they're certainly good enough. The first sight of Zelda was phenomenally cool.
• The games are EXPENSIVE. I know, true of any current-gen box - but man. The games are $53 a pop, and my wallet hurts!
• There aren't many games. I pray that this doesn't become a Gamecube.
• The internet connectivity is spotty. I talked about this before, and haven't had time to fool with it much further. I did change the channel my AP was using, as David suggested and it seemed to be better.
• Virtual Console uses a "points" system. You have to buy these things online, and you have to do calculations to figure out how much Mario 64 really costs (around $20 I thinkit's $10, thanks David!).
• It's beautiful. It really is a nice looking machine, that I'm happy to have sitting by my TV (on the floor, so Professor Babbles'Mc'Babblefoot doesn't knock it over when she flees from things outside)

All in all, this system is working out wonderfully. E. and I have really had a great time with Wii sports and I'm fully loving Zelda. I believe that this really was a good investment that'll keep us entertained for years to come.

Wii Browser Doesn't Work
December 23, 2006

So... I've spent the night trying to browse the web using the Wii browser. I've realized that it just plain doesn't work. Number 1, the Wii's connection to Wireless Internet APs sucks. I don't know why, but it can never connect the first time. Every other device, including the DS, connects... the Wii sticks its thumb up it's ass and fished around for awhile before giving up and forcing me to retry. Number 2, the Opera browser for the Wii just plain don't work. I gave up just now while browsing 2chan. I hit the back button seven times with no response from the Wii. Oi. Get your act together Nintendo. We're excited, but we'll tell the world when you fail.

David, how's your Wii Opera experience going?

Update: The back button definitely doesn't work on 2chan. Sorry Nintendo, you're trying to sell us this service, right? At least make it work. At $300 or so for the console, I should expect that you could at least make your demos work.

Update Update: David's suggestion about changing the channel worked for me. Everything seems squared away now.

We Got a Wii!
December 04, 2006

So, Emily and I got whiff of the great Wii shipment that was to arrive at various stores around St. Cloud this Sunday and quickly discussed amongst ourselves. We had great fun playing Wii Sports over at Andy's apartment but could the Wii have enough staying power to be worth it? Could we really justify spending $250 on something so inconsequential? Well, Saturday night we spent the majority of our evening playing Wii Sports at Andy's with my good friend James and Mike Arney (Hi Mike!). We were steeled in our resolve.

Fast forward to 6A on Sunday morning as babbles wakes us up by vomiting on our dresser. We scamper off to clean it up and get ourselves ready for the great trek. We show up at Target around 07:45A thinking that nobody had heard of the shipment and were dismayed to see a long line of people and to find out that there were no more tickets left. Damn.

We moved on to Toys"r"us where we found only eight people waiting on line! Hopeful and optimistic we spouted off our number (9!) when the manager came out to hand out tickets and loe! We got one! I haven't had that much joy about participating in consumerism in a long time!

In a happy little rush, we moved on to our spotted quarry. We picked up our extra Wiimote and Zelda (who can resist Zelda? I think that if there were still a breakfast cereal themed to Link... I would buy it and eat it every day). We skipped on over to the checkout lane where we tendered our hard earned money to someone who tried to sell us insurance on the Wii, because it's Megapixels could go bad. I asked the lady behind us in the line if she had remembered to change her blinker fluid. She was unphased.

After tendering our money we went over to the distribution counter and out came our Wii! WIIIIIIIII! We went home, I hooked it up, setup a Mii and then promptly went to sleep.

How is it, you ask? That's for another post.

Wii Hits St. Cloud
November 19, 2006

Well, it's official - I will be living with Andy and Mike now. That's right Emily, pack up your bags and your Babbles because they have a Wii. They were originally planning on camping out the night before and being able to be among the first ones to grab it, but it appeared that there really weren't that many people in St. Cloud who were interested (Gee, whoda thunk?). They showed up at Target right before it opened, and got in line. Apparently the Target here in town got 27 units - while the ebgames only got 6. SIX. Thankfully they managed to be in line before the sad 28th person. How sad must they be? Very sad indeed.

Sadly, the only multiplayer game that they got was Wii Sports. The level of suckage that I displayed at Wii golf is second to none - but it was fun whirling the little Wiimote around while watching the others around me groan with pain. I suck at golf, and I really suck at Wii golf. It actually takes into account spin as well as force and direction. Veeery interesting. I can't wait for them to get Red Steel so that I may feel the katana* wielding joy of the Wiimote in it's fullest.

Twilight Princess is also looking to be quite entertaining. I watched Mike herd goats for about ten minutes, and was enthralled. The graphics really are quite nice and the interface system is stellar. Sadly, I'm sick with a cold so I didn't want to stay too long and infect them all. I've already done a fine enough job spreading the Caturday infection.

I'm looking forward to the Wii getting some more titles so that I can justify buying one. Hmm. I'd better not say that too loud, Emily might kill me. I already take over enough of her precious TV time by playing Final Fantasy. Thankfully the laptop doesn't have TV out, or she would also be exposed to mass quantities of anime.

* An interesting note; this is what Firefox suggests as the "correct" spelling of katana: Watanabe .